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This July 4th feels complicated. It feels heavy.
While we celebrate independence, it’s important to recognize that freedom isn’t yet a shared experience for everyone. Many—queer and trans people, immigrants, BIPOC communities—are still fighting for safety, dignity, and a true sense of belonging. Recent policy decisions, including cuts to Medicare, Medicaid, SNAP, and other essential programs, serve as a reminder of how much work remains to ensure everyone has access to the care and support they need. I believe we aren’t truly American without all of us. That’s why I’m proud to be an ally and advocate —because loving this country means being committed to helping it live up to its ideals. Today and every day, I’m holding space for reflection, hope, and the ongoing work of building a more inclusive and caring nation. Will you join me? #July4th #Belonging #FreedomForAll #Equity #Inclusion #Advocacy #CareMatters “Love is a temporary madness.” Saint Augustine wrote. “It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being in love which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident.” This quote stopped me in my tracks last year as I prepared my VANTalk—a deeply personal reflection on love, faith, and my journey toward embracing and standing with the LGBTQIA+ community.
As Pride Month begins, I’m returning to these words and sharing them again because they still ring true: real love—the kind that remains after the fire, that chooses to stay, to grow, to intertwine—is at the heart of acceptance and liberation. Pride is rooted in love. How will you love today? Recently, I was asked to name a leader who inspires me, and without hesitation, I said, “My mother.” If you asked her, though, I’m certain she wouldn’t consider herself a leader—and perhaps that’s exactly what makes her so remarkable.
My mom leads through acts of service. Every day, she models leadership through quiet kindness, unwavering love, and selflessness. Don’t get me wrong—she has a fiery side too, but it only shows when it’s truly deserved and necessary. At the core of everything she does, she embodies love—real, deep, unconditional love. Whenever Mother’s Day comes around, I struggle to find the “right” words to describe how much she means to me. I’ve yet to find any that truly capture how blessed I feel to be her daughter. So rather than ramble in search of them, I’ll end with this: my mom is a complete badass. She raised not one, but two dynamic women, and we both agree we wouldn’t be who we are today without her. Love you, Mom! I’ve been reflecting deeply on my dear friend Ach’ Sheila Davis’ powerful post about circular thinking, where she shared, “Growing up, I learned about leadership not as a top-down command but as a shared circle of voices.” She invited us to think about moments in our lives where we’ve experienced this kind of leadership — and this morning, one memory came to mind vividly.
Back in 2021, in the midst of the pandemic and the global reckoning following the murder of George Floyd, I found myself brainstorming with a group of local BIPOC leaders. Our shared question: how could PAL of SWWA actively work toward rebuilding trust between youth and law enforcement? Through collective conversation, an idea emerged — one rooted in the very spirit of circular leadership. We proposed that a group of BIPOC teens meet virtually with local law enforcement to engage in real, unfiltered conversations about community tensions and experiences with policing. The key principle? That the young people would lead. The adults — including us — would be present only to listen and offer support when needed. The power belonged to the youth. And that’s where the “circular thinking” Ach’ described truly came to life. After the initial four sessions wrapped up, something incredible happened. A small group of youth who participated wanted to go further. They envisioned a broader dialogue — one that included not just law enforcement, but also first responders, educators, social justice leaders, and local elected officials. They wanted to ask hard questions, understand the root causes of the issues we face, and explore how they, as teens, could be part of the solution. It was bold. It was inspiring. And it was entirely driven by their vision. Our role as adults? To amplify their efforts. We tapped into our networks and helped bring together some of the most influential figures in our region for a new four-part conversation series — all led by these incredible young leaders. These discussions were held live on Facebook, where their questions, insights, and courage were on full display for the community to witness. It was the youth who led the way — who reminded us what leadership truly looks like. They modeled for their peers and for the adults in the room that their voices matter — because they do. For me, someone who deeply believes in listening to and learning from young people, it was a powerful reminder of what can happen when we, as adults, step aside and let youth lead. It was a circle — not a hierarchy — and in that circle, real transformation began. |
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